Monday, August 27, 2012

anxiety= no fun at all

       Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength.
                                                                                                     Charles Spurgeon

How do you explain this quote to a 5 year old?! We've had a lot of anxiety around our house in the last few days...a LOT!!  I've found myself on the edge all day and can't sleep from a racing mind.  So, it is clear to me that Eliana's anxiety has rubbed off on me.  I'm pleading with God tonight for peace...for strength for a new day.  I'm worn out and just feel like sobbing.  One of my least favorite things in the world is watching my precious girl (who is perfect in every way) drowning in fear, anxiety and panic.  Then, those scary little words lead her into unexplained rage.  It's nights like tonight where I would give anything to go back to the day she was born and rock her/sing to her/make her feel safe until she turned one (when I moved to Guatemala to be with her).  Instead, I am trying to trust the Lord that this has always been His plan for our little girl.  I could go into details, but none are really needed. She just needs prayer.  There is still a lot of good going on in her little heart and soul...and I am so thankful for that.  She's talking up a storm, making us laugh, and doing really well in her pre-K class.  Praise God for that!!  I am just one exhausted, Lyme-disease fighting momma who longs for her baby girl to feel safe.  I blew out my candles on my cake yesterday (yes, it was two days late because of her anxiety) and prayed for a year of miracles for my Eliana and for me. 

Much love,


Carol said...

We will continue to pray for you all. I look forward to seeing the ways that God makes this good in your lives!

cindy said...

Praying for you and Eliana and Chris. Believe me, I understand your pain. It is so hard. Things are better for us but the fear is still very present. I am available to talk ANYTIME! Love you.
Cindy Hannah

Lainie said...

I continue to pray for you all daily - wisdom, strength, peace, . . . Love you.

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