Monday, August 27, 2012

anxiety= no fun at all

       Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength.
                                                                                                     Charles Spurgeon

How do you explain this quote to a 5 year old?! We've had a lot of anxiety around our house in the last few days...a LOT!!  I've found myself on the edge all day and can't sleep from a racing mind.  So, it is clear to me that Eliana's anxiety has rubbed off on me.  I'm pleading with God tonight for peace...for strength for a new day.  I'm worn out and just feel like sobbing.  One of my least favorite things in the world is watching my precious girl (who is perfect in every way) drowning in fear, anxiety and panic.  Then, those scary little words lead her into unexplained rage.  It's nights like tonight where I would give anything to go back to the day she was born and rock her/sing to her/make her feel safe until she turned one (when I moved to Guatemala to be with her).  Instead, I am trying to trust the Lord that this has always been His plan for our little girl.  I could go into details, but none are really needed. She just needs prayer.  There is still a lot of good going on in her little heart and soul...and I am so thankful for that.  She's talking up a storm, making us laugh, and doing really well in her pre-K class.  Praise God for that!!  I am just one exhausted, Lyme-disease fighting momma who longs for her baby girl to feel safe.  I blew out my candles on my cake yesterday (yes, it was two days late because of her anxiety) and prayed for a year of miracles for my Eliana and for me. 

Much love,

Friday, August 24, 2012

Happy 33rd - We're Gonna Make It!

“We’re Gonna Make It”

This is what Lindsey and I say back and forth to each other every day – sometimes multiple times a day. It’s our way of holding on to hope for one another. The truth is we ARE gonna make and we are MAKING it – by the Grace of God. Today is Lindsey’s Birthday. It’s time to give Glory to God for my wife’s incredible life! With all my heart I want her to feel celebrated. I want her to feel the respect and admiration we (her friends and family) have for her.

Most folks have no idea how TOUGH she truly is. Though she may not look sick, you need to know she is…big time. There are days that just getting out of bed is major triumph. Lindsey is such a trooper. In short, Lindsey Erin Wheeler is brave. Lyme disease is a wicked concoction. Exhaustion and pain are such weak words to describe her symptoms. Imagine never ever feeling rested. Imagine walking through each day as if you’d just pulled a week of all-nighters. Imagine aching all over as if you have the burn of arthritis in every joint. Imagine your skin crawling with tingling sensations that are un-itch-able. I literally don’t know how she does it. I don’t know how she keeps pushing forward.

Lately she’s been enduring some incredibly intense detox sessions to counteract her Lyme disease. Just the descriptions of these detox routines would make your toes curl. She endures potions, salves, soaks, supplements, hyperbaric chambers, oxygen treatments, nutritional i.v.s, saunas, and so much more.  While undergoing these procedures she’s actively listening to those around her at the facility looking for ways to encourage and share hope with them! Are you kidding me? She’s ministering to those around her while gagging down medicine! What!

On top of battling Lyme every day – Lindsey is one amazing Momma. She pushes through the pain and exhaustion in order to invest in our girl. Most folks in her position would end up hiring full time help just in order to rest. Instead, Lindsey has made the heroic choice to stay home with Eliana in order to continue to create felt safety and security in our little girls’ soul. Lindsey plays endless silly games of dress up, tea parties, store, cooking and art projects with Eliana. When I come home each day I marvel at the hilarious conversations they’ve had throughout day. Lindsey is so good with Eliana. Lindsey is unbelievably patient.

Lately Lindsey has been deeply stirred that despite all of this we need to be grateful. She read “One Thousand Gifts” by Ann Voskamp and took it to heart. Lindsey has continually been pointing out all that God has done and is doing for us in the midst of the pain, stress and strain. If I felt what she felt I’d be the biggest whiner on the planet - you’d never hear the end of it.

Lindsey is a model to us all of forgiveness, endurance, long-suffering, patience and sufficient grace.

Lindsey is a powerhouse.

I’m so incredibly proud of her.

If you see her out and about be sure to tell her how brave you think she is!

I love you with all my heart Lindsey,
- Chris

Monday, August 20, 2012

lindsey's birthday

As many of you know Lindsey is in the battle of her life for her life. She is in near constant pain and discomfort. The word "fatigue" seems so inadequate to express the amount of exhaustion she feels. Her lyme disease and co-infections have almost crushed her poor body. In addition Lindsey continues to be an amazing Momma to Eliana and patient wife to me. Lindsey is now bravely enduring an extremely intensive detox program. This regime is designed to pull or even force lyme toxins from her system. Once a week she is undergoing nutritional IVs, hyperbaric chambers, lymphatic beds, pure oxygen breathing treatments, 140 degree saunas, and over 25 unique supplements designed to flush toxins out of her body. These sessions last 4-7 hours at a time. I can't tell you how proud I am of her. (Just the smell of these supplements makes me nauseous - let alone swallow them.) I am trusting and believing that God is going to use this detoxification / cleansing program as the next significant step in her healing journey.
We are so thankful for all that God provided recently through our other Give Forward page. It feels a bit awkward to talk about money again but the truth is these 4-7 hour sessions cost about $800-$1,000 a piece. I love my job and I'm so thankful for the incredible opportunity to work at Show Hope. It's a perfect fit for our family. At this point however I can't take on any additional work (speaking gigs etc.) because it would mean more time away from Eliana - she really needs me home right now. Throughout this journey God has continually provided for the financial burdens of the medical expenses for Lindsey and Eliana through the generosity of folks around us. We're now asking God to do it again. To send people like you to help us find healing for Lindsey.

Just to make the giving interesting I thought I'd break down Lindsey's detox sessions into what I like to call "Dollars for Detox."

5 cents = 1 second of detox
$1 = 20 seconds of detox
$3 = 1 minute of detox
$180 = 1 hour of detox
$720 = 1 session of detox
$2,160= 1 month of detox
$25,920= 1 year of detox (this will at least last one year)

Her birthday is FRIDAY, August 24th.  In honor of her birthday, click here to contribute to her Lyme detox program. Spread the word.

Thanks friends,

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Love this girl


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